Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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