I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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