i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just found a bag of teeth...
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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