I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
