Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
