i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
