no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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