I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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