dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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