i barfeds in our rink
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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