Nicole vs. Life
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
