btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
