You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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