Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
