Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
