i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
