I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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