i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
