I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
