i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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