hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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