Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
