Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
May the power of my ass compel you!!
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
