When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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