I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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