He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i was born a porn star she said
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
This baby is an asshole
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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