whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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