I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
