Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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