It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Randomize