i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Randomize
