You really coming over, don't trick.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
