drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize