So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
