Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
They have beer where we have blood.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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