Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
