Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
