New invention idea: vibrating tampons
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize