dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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