So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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