Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
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