so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
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