guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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