no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
