Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
