school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
