There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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