I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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