I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
