You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
