my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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