I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
